An Introduction to the Wonderful World of Comics

Hey guys just introducing myself to theneek.com with my first post on comics. Like the rest of my colleagues my love of comics borders on the fanatical with many an hour spent debating the pros and cons of the likes of Brian Michael Bendis (recently more cons then pros in my humble opinion), why Superman is the greatest (shut up! thats why!) and why is Norman Osbourne leader of everything when he is quite clearly still a psycho killer (the jury is still out on this one). I'll bring up a variety of these topics over the course of the next few months with my unique(ish) take on all the action and news coming up such as the rundown to Blackest Night and Geoff John's run on Flash: Rebirth and much more! Something for you guys to look forward to then ;-)

First and foremost, however, will be my weekly comic review. To add an interesting spin, rather than doing a brief review of a whole bunch of comics, every week I will pick one comic that has moved me with its brilliance or its pure assness and give a more detailed reasoning as to why I have decided either way. Unforunately for us comic fans this week we got served with another rancid portion of the **** that is Hulk and for that reason I give to you now my deconstruction of this series and this most recent issue.

Hulk #11 is "written" by Jeph Loeb and pencilled by Ed McGuinness. Now I'll tell you right now: I am a fanboy (incase you didn't get that for my reasons for liking Superman!). I was a mad fan of the Hulk when I was younger and then again on Bruce Jones' run (with its cop out IT WAS ALL A DREAAAAAAAAAAAAAAM ending). But since then my love of the Hulk had more or less burnt out until Greg Pak's run on The Hulk starting with Planet Hulk. This immediately caught my attention as for the first time in a long time (maybe ever) the Hulk had more character then just HULK SMASH! LOVE BETTY! I AM GREEN BLEEEEH or alternatively I AM SMART NOW I HAVE THE BRAIN OF BANNER WHICH AUTOMATICALLY MAKES ME WEAKER! Planet Hulk had it all, savagery, cunning and best of all: a personality. However, my love for Hulk was short-lived as he used this new found fame to crush all my favourite heroes in the hilariously titled World War Hulk and I use the word hilarious to describe this for two reasons. Firstly, it wasn't a "World War" at all, Hulk descended onto the Earth with his rag tag gang of henchmos and beat the living **** out of everyone inside the first couple of issues, even with the likes of Dr Strange and The Sentry being relegated to fisticuffs with The Hulk despite having the power to destroy him a million times over. Secondly its hilarious because despite all the story and characterisation Planet Hulk and its proceeding arcs managed to establish the conclusion of World War Hulk reverted him back into his brainless form, thereby effectively negating EVERYTHING he had done up to that point. The only lasting effect being the changing of the title to Incredible Hercules (another title that has lost its charm as of late) and the re-launching of Hulk with the introduction of Red Hulk.

This comic is 11 issues in and has constantly been near the top of the best-selling comic lists since its release, and the only question I can ask is: WHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHY! Since issue 1, Jeph Loeb has done his best to piss all over established continuity with these brain-dead comics with no relevance to ANYTHING. Despite promising the identity of Red Hulk would be revealed within the first arc we have had ZERO information about this new Hulk despite the fact he hates Banner (join the club). Why does he get hotter when he gets angrier? Why is he even red? WHO THE **** IS IT???????? Also why is he so freakin powerful one minute and pathetically weak the next (beating Thor then getting taken out by Invisible Women, Storm and She-Hulk). In one of the early issues he manages to punch out Uatu the Watcher followed by being able to defeat Odin-force powered Thor by using HIS OWN HAMMER AGAINST HIM! *fanboy alert* Any comic book fan worth his or her salt (political correctness :-P) knows that that is impossible. Thor and Hulk have had many fights over the years and can arguably be put on a similar level of strength. However, the Thor that has been introduced in the JMS run has the power of Odin, which provides yet another example of someone being reduced to brawling despite their superior powerset in relation to The Hulk. Odin poweredThor in The Reigning managed to beat The Thing and The Hulk to death with his bare hands with half power. So why is this incarnation unable to even MOVE him with a full powered Mjolnir strike which has been shown to be subsequently powerful enough to kill Bor, father of Odin and Lord of Asgard. The fight should have been one panel long, Thor smashes Hulk in the face, Hulk's head explodes and then we all go home happy cause we have been spared the pain of this piece of **** comic. The is completely disregarding the fact that Thor wouldn't have even started on Rulk in the first place, showing Loeb's complete lack of respect for the time and effort JMS has put into the story and characterisation on his Thor run, two concepts that Jeph Loeb seems to have forgotten completely.

Now don't get me wrong. Despite my obvious resentment of Loeb on his Hulk run (and what he has done to the Ultimates but that rant is for another day) he was actually one of my favourite writers at one point. I have read all his collaborations with Tim Sale and Superman For All Seasons and Daredevil: Yellow are two of the prides of my collection. Firstly, Sale's art is phenomenal with a uniquness that is un-matched by contemporary artists. However, the main reason I liked these comics so much is the writting. Loeb managed to capture the essence of the characters perfectly, composing stories that made you cheer when they were successful and melancholy when they failed. But ever since then I don't know what has happened to him, but that spark that made his stories so enjoyable have been lost completely. Its as if he has realised that he doesn't need to write good stories to sell comics so he doesn't even try anymore.

Hulk #11 (actually getting to the review now :-P) is a perfect example of all of my complaints in one handy issue. Apart from McGuinness' art this comic has not one redeeming feature. Like the rest of the issues it is a massive fight, however, rather than it being merely a fight between the title characters, this time the Hulk has The Defenders backing him up whilst Rulk has The Offenders (I know...I know...). The story changes as each combatant (Hulk, Dr Strange, Silver Surfer and Namor on the good side, Rulk, Mordo, Terrax and Tiger Shark on the evil side) has been forced to fight each other on various different battleground (the microverse, zenn la etc etc) in game devised by the ever-scheming elders of the universe. Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaand thats it. Literally. I just described to you the whole 22 page issue in 3 sentences. Nothing happens at all. They fight, they fight a bit more, some more fighting, then the issue finishes. There is no more apt an issue of comic in recent times that can be described by the phrase "all style no substance" and it makes me fear for the state of the comic industry as a whole. It reminds me too much of the dark age of comics (aka the 90s) where people were too focused about characters with giant guns and glowing eyes rather than focusing on crafting a compelling story and it almost led to the complete demise of the comic industry as a whole. How this comic is in the top 5 of the diamond list every month it is released is a travesty. It makes my teeth itch, thats how bad it is. And the saddest thing about this issue is, that its going to be exactly the same next month and the month after that until Marvel pulls its socks up and realises that if it keeps putting **** like this out every month it is going to go straight back to how things got in the 90s. But with it selling out each month it looks like we are stuck with this pointless **** until Loeb gets bored...or finally manages to recover that spark that made him so successful in the first place. Overall then I would give this issue (and the series as a whole) a score of 1 out of 5 as the art is pretty good. But Jeph Loeb if you ever read this for whatever reason, please know that I am still your fan at heart but man! SORT IT OUT!